People think that I never fail because I write and I know a lot of things about success, happiness and conscious life, but I am a human being, and what people think is not true, I fail in things more than you might imagine, and much more than I would like to admit; I fail at one stage or another in everything just like you, and I feel a very unpleasant feeling like me like everyone else.

I feel frustrated and guilty, I try to avoid thinking about it, I prefer to hide it, but deep down I know that such negative reactions are not useful; so I admit what happened, learn a lesson or two from my failed experiences, and then come back and try again, the last part is the most important part and it’s trying again:

I sometimes fail to eat healthy meals, but I try again.

I fail to stick to my exercise schedules, but I make up for it by going to the gym and exercising more actively.

I fail to love myself sometimes, but I don’t give up on myself either and try again.

I fail to be a great dad sometimes, especially when I get distracted at work, but I keep trying, and more and more often I put a smile back on my children’s face.

I even failed to write the article you are reading now, and I made an initial attempt and deleted it; because it was not good, but I started again and finished it.

I often succeed in achieving my goal when I try again and again, and one of the most important things you should learn from this article is that trying again is always worth it, and once you understand this simple principle you can apply these four unique strategies to give yourself another chance, by letting go of your failures and learning from them.

Here are these four unique strategies for getting rid of failure:

1. Monitor your thoughts and emotions:

We need to observe our thoughts without overthinking them, instead of trying to change them every moment through gratitude or forgiveness, you are the one who formulates your feelings, when negative thoughts appear based on past experiences or future fears, you need to realize that they are thoughts that your mind is dealing with; so stop, be present, pay close attention, and think about these thoughts and emotions consciously as if you were a spectator looking at your thoughts.

Separate yourself from your thoughts, and over time your negative feelings and emotions will decrease, true awareness, love and acceptance will grow, and you will begin to realize that your mind is just a tool, that it is you who controls it and not vice versa, by not judging your thoughts, blaming yourself or someone else, and only by observing it will a big transformation take place inside you.

Your sense of self-esteem will grow, it’s not that you won’t fail, get upset or that you will never feel anxious, but knowing that your thoughts and emotions are just fleeting feelings that are independent of you, will help relieve your stress and increase your positive presence, giving you the opportunity to learn and start all over again.

2. Monitor and correct your negative thinking:

You subconsciously match past experiences with the present, and when an experience in your life has emotional significance it is classified in your mind as important, and when the emotional experience is tragic, it stimulates feelings of fear in your mind, which gives orders to your mind to remain alert to any future circumstances that remind you of this tragic experience, and it does this to protect you from harm in the future, then your mind tries to match new experiences with the old one, but depending on how emotionally connected you are with the original experience, this can lead to the formation of false feelings that lead to loss, and this is especially true when it comes to personal failures, mistakes and miscalculations, for example:

1. Your relationship has broken down, so now you think that all your future relationships will break down too.
2. You got a low score on an exam in high school; so now you doubt your ability to perform any form of Written Exam.

You didn’t get along with your old boss; so now you have a problem respecting a new boss.

Again, this false association process occurs when you respond in a negative and emotional way to a certain past experience, and all this happens subconsciously, you know that all relationships are completely different, but you respond emotionally as if they were identical, and if you feel helpless because you can’t get over a previous failed experience, your mind connects to it as if it is still happening now, which means that it connects the two experiences incorrectly in the present.

Here’s two-step solution that might help:

• Ask yourself: “what is the failed experience of the past and the feelings associated with it that my current feelings remind me of?””Look deeply and be honest with yourself.
• After determining the origin of your current feelings, make a list of all the things by which your current circumstances differ from the past; the original failed experience, this should include the places, people and details that caused pain and discomfort, and review the differences again and again until you fully understand them, this can help you realize and remember that circumstances have already changed.

3. Constantly review your progress and determine to what stage you have reached:

Even though you know intellectually that you are stronger than you were in the past, but your subconscious mind often forgets that your abilities have grown, here’s a quick metaphorical example: zookeepers usually tie a thin metal chain to the leg of a large elephant, and then tie the other end to a small wooden stake buried in the ground.a 10-foot (3 m) tall elephant, weighing 10,000 pounds (4.5 tons), can easily cut the chain, cut the wooden stake and escape to freedom with minimal effort, but it doesn’t; because it never tried.

The strongest wild animal in the world, which can uproot a tree as easily as it can break a toothpick, remains defeated by a small wooden dowel and a flimsy chain; this is because when he was small his trainers used exactly the same methods to raise him; a thin chain was tied around his leg and the other end of the chain was tied to a wooden peg in the ground, and at that time, the chain and the peg were strong enough to restrain the little elephant when he tried to get rid of it, when the metal chain was pulling him back, the elephant was pulling hard, but the chain the little one that trying to escape is not possible; so he stopped trying, and now that he’s grown up he sees the chain and the peg He remembers what he learned when he was little that it was impossible to escape from the chain and the stake, this is no longer true, the elephant that used to weigh 100 kg, is now a 5000 kg elephant.

If you think about it, we are all like elephants, we all have a great power inside us, and just like that we have something that restrains us; self-beliefs that hinder us, such as a childhood experience, an early failure, or something we were told when we were children; so we need to learn from the past, but we must be willing to update what we have learned based on how our circumstances have changed.

Here are two things to consider::

1. If you suspect that you are currently living your life through beliefs from the past, remind yourself of what is different now in terms of circumstances and your own abilities, what has changed inside you And what do you know now and didn’t know then
2. Check what you have learned from past failures and hardships that can actually help you now, and instead of regretting the past, ask specifically how it helped you grow, and did your past teach you to be assertive, self-reliant, aware, strong, compassionate, etc Focus on what you have gained, rather than what you have lost from previous negative experiences.

4. Learn to see beauty in uncertainty:

Nothing can be expected and nothing is certain in this world, this is the truth, you need to understand that none of us is special, sometimes we win and sometimes we lose, life is always balanced; so don’t expect to get everything you desire, don’t expect appreciation for every effort you make, don’t expect that your genius will be recognized immediately, or that your love will be understood by everyone you meet, there are things you don’t want to happen, but you have to accept them, things you don’t want to know, but you have to learn, people and circumstances you can’t live without, but you have to let them go.

Some things come into your life just to strengthen you so that you can move on without them, and some people call these experiences failures, but they are positive lessons, as you live and experience things you must realize what belongs to your life and what does not belong, what works and what does not, and then let things go when you know that you should, not because of pride, inability or arrogance; but because not everything is supposed to fit into your life.

So forget about the past, move your soul, get rid of painful memories, stop being what you were before so that you can become what you are today, it’s time to let go of what happened yesterday and unleash the current potential of your life.

In conclusion:

I hope you have found value in the four strategies mentioned above, I have shared them because they have helped hundreds of our clients over the past decade, I am far from perfect just like you, we all share the commonality of failing and rising to a better level, we also share the bond of being able to start over, and that is what we must do together.